Customs with a side of sarcasm

03 Oct

We arrived at Pearson International Airport in Toronto around 11:00am on Friday.  I was lucky enough to get randomly selected in the security line.  The security officer (in a “you’re a winner” voice) said… “YOU have two options.”  Behind door number 1 – the full body scanner that bares it all to the officer. There’s no hiding things here folks.  Behind door number 2 – getting felt up by a random stranger.

Hmmm…options, options.

I selected door 1 – I’ve always wanted to bare it all without actually taking my clothes off – awesome!

The U.S. customs line was amazingly fast (for once). I walk up to the kiosk, hand the customs officer my passport and the conversations begins…

  • Officer (with a stern face): So, tell me about yourself.

I thought…this is strange, usually they just ask questions…ah! lightbulb moment and inside giggle

  • Me (with a big grin): Well, I’m married, I have two kids and a cat named Kingston, I enjoy longs walks on the beach and I really like 80s music…what else would you like to know?
  • Officer (with a slight grin): Umm…I was thinking more like – what were you doing in Canada?

Ha! Take that customs officer!  I made you (somewhat) smile!  Mission accomplished!

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Posted by on October 3, 2011 in Travel


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